2020 Updates

Here goes another post of random ramblings! Let's get ready to RRRRR-AMBLE!!!!!

2020 has been a sad start. From Kobe Bryant's tragic passing, to Ravi Zacharias and Irfan Khan as of late; 2020 has been a sad year so far and it's just going to get more sad with all that's been happening.

COVID has put a halt in most of the world's economy. Slowly but surely, things will start to open up. Hopefully those who have lost jobs/income will be able to go back to their jobs or find new ones. It's a difficult time for many. Let's try to help one another out. Stick with the social distancing rules and please don't gather in large groups!

The past few months I have been working as a front line staff. It started off very difficult as we had staff off on sick leave or leave of absence or what not. It was not surprising to have 8 staff call in sick per shift on a daily basis. Considering it takes about 33-35 staff to run the department per shift, losing 8 members took a huge toll on the rest of us. Especially when certain staff were off for 2 weeks or more. On top of that, we've had community transmissions which affected our clients, and having to do contact tracing which resulted in several isolations. Let me just say, it was a madhouse. And that was just before the pandemic began. I had to put my usual work duty on hold in order to be on the front lines because that's how bad it became. Thankfully we have started pandemic preparations before this happened and implemented strict policies so we have not seen a huge rise in cases.

Things have started to taper off gradually, but seeing the community start gathering in large groups when the officials have implemented strict rules on social distancing, it really pisses me off. We don't know when this second wave will happen but seeing how things are right now, it could happen very soon. And we may not be prepared for it. However, it doesn't mean we won't continue implementing our policies. We still are and we will still continue for as long as it's needed.

I was looking back at previous posts and just realized that wow, I have not bought any handbags for almost 2 years. That to me is like celebrating sobriety. It can truly be an addiction that is not good for the wallet. But as I accumulated all these bags, I kept thinking to myself...why do I need so many bags?! How many arms do I have anyways?! And the thing that really stuck out to me was that I rarely have time to go out. All I do is work. There's no way in heck that I would want to take any of those bags to work, especially during this pandemic. So I've basically worked to buy bags, for them to sit on my shelf. Yeah, so that's one hobby that I have set aside for now and just focus on life. There is more to life than handbags that's for sure. It hasn't stopped me from window shopping and dreaming of certain bags. But seeing how things are now, it just doesn't make sense to get handbags.

Speaking of which, both Louis Vuitton and Chanel have raised their prices during this pandemic. LV did two price increases. TWO. DURING A PANDEMIC. How narcissistic is that?! I understand that companies are struggling to sell products during this time but seriously. TWO increases? come on now. And Chanel has raised their prices, anywhere from 7-27%. That is HUGE. So now it will cost just north of 9 grand for a medium classic flap. 9 GRAND! I could get a GT4 body kit instead.

I just honestly think it's so classless and ridiculous of them to do such a thing. In Chanel's case, it's obvious that they don't care about most of the customers. They care about those who are willing to drop 10 grand on a bag without blinking an eye. They want to focus only on the super rich. They do NOT want people who've saved up their hard earned money over the years and reward themselves with a bag. No. They don't want them. Their market is the super rich and only the super rich. In my opinion, it's the wrong move. The only reason why Chanel has sold so many products lately is not because of the super rich, but those who are "normal" middle class people who have worked hard and bought their products over the years. They may not have dropped 50k at once to buy 4 handbags, but they may have over the years bought certain amount of bags and jewelry, or whatever accessories. That still adds up. So if anything, the middle class has helped Chanel with their profits in the past decade. For them to do this, it just shows they're not as classy as we thought they were. They will end up losing a lot of customers. There is only so much a super rich person can buy from Chanel.

LV is trying to pull a Chanel stunt. The only difference is LV is making customers pay thousands of dollars for a canvas bag, and not a leather bag. If you want leather, you have to pay a minimum of 3 grand or more for the bag, and can go upwards of 10 grand or more, depending on the type of leather. I was never really a fan of LV, even though there was one that really caught my eye. When I saw it in person, it was a lot smaller than I imagined, and now they're asking north of 2 grand for it. Does it look classy? Not really. It is more fun and casual but not as classy as I thought it would be.

I've basically lost respect for those two companies. A complete classless act. They really should be ashamed of themselves. But they're so stuck up that they probably don't care. So why should we care to carry their products?

Speaking of not caring. For those who have been on social media a lot (IG mostly), you've probably seen the recent police activities among car gatherings. A while ago I mentioned a group called TOtakeovers, and we all think it's members from there plus more, who cause havoc among Toronto streets at night. The stunts include doing donuts at intersections, donuts in parking lots, drag racing on a stretch of public road, and there was one which stopped traffic on the 401 because someone decided to do a donut there too.

Since the pandemic began, there has been a huge increase of stunt driving on Toronto streets. I work almost everyday and I can say there is little to no traffic on my way to work every morning, so I can imagine what it's like at night. Probably no traffic, if at all very little. This still should not be a reason for people to go out in hoards, and start doing donuts in the middle of intersections. I don't mean 10 people, but it's upwards in the hundreds that people congregate at these meets. It's getting ridiculous to the point that police will stop any car that looks modified, and give tickets just because they can. It's affecting everybody. For those who actually stayed at home, and went out for a quick drive to warm up the car, they get stopped because they drive a fast looking car. Thankfully I have not been pulled over, but that's because I avoid driving at night. This is just getting way too ridiculous. And it's those types of people that ruin the rest of the car community for us.

You might think, well just take it to the track then!

Here's a funny story. This past Tuesday is when stage 1 of reopening certain public areas began. This included parks, golf courses and of course, race tracks.

Day one of open lapping at Cayuga. It was a complete disaster. It involved a group of (sorry to say if I sound racist) China boys. Yup. I said it. China boys. Videos from the cars were posted to social media, which showed them disregarding the rules, overtaking others when they're not suppose to, and not driving behind one another. It seems that people forgot how to drive after staying home for so long.

The worst part is, they congregated at the last turn, not very far from a live track lane. And started shouting and punching each other. This all stemmed because a CLA would not let people pass and others behind him thought it was too slow. One thing led to another and boom. Again, I hate to say this but the Chinese mainlanders just isn't helping. It's not helping that this pandemic stemmed from China, but now you have these China boys swearing at each other and talking so loud too. I listened in to the video and yes, they were definitely saying stuff like F your mother! F your mother! Yeah, until you have to call her back in China to give you more money to fix your cars. Such an embarrassment to all Asians around the world. I watch that video and get so disgusted. Then it gets on the news and you see a bunch of pubescent China boys fighting. Ridiculous.

I also felt bad for the random Vette owner. That was the Vette that became engulfed in flames. I bet he didn't expect to lose his car that way either. Insurance is going to be a bitch. Let's hope he got the track insurance.

I will leave you a link for your enjoyment to read (and watch if the link is still available):
Cayuga 2020 day 1 disaster

I feel like I've talked a lot of car stuff so let's talk about....

Tax season. The government was nice to extend the deadline for tax season to June 1. Of which I have not done my taxes yet. Shoot. It's always an exciting time because I get to find out if I get any returns, or on a sad note, if I have to pay back the government. I remember talking to someone who worked more than 2 jobs and they had to pay back 10 grand to the government. Holy crap. I think the biggest mistake was not buying RRSP. It's also when I found out working all those overtimes may not always be so beneficial because in the end, you still have to pay it back. So what's the point of all that?! I hate the government most of the time.

That's it for now. I shall return soon. Stay safe everyone.

Sciatica...

For those who don't know, I've struggled with a bad back for the past decade. It all stemmed from an injury while assisting someone. One event has now led to a complete downfall during my young adulthood.

I have done physiotherapy to help alleviate some pain, but during crazy scheduling, it has been difficult trying to keep up with it religiously. Unfortunately my clinic has now closed down as the owner has retired. Since then, I hadn't had much time to look around for another, so I figured I would do my own little stretches at home.

So that's what I have been doing, especially lately with a lot of running around, and my back is in dying need of rest and stretch. That is what I did last week and I guess I must have pulled something during one of my stretches (maybe went a bit too far compared to the usual). The next thing I know, there is a sharp pain going down my back and my leg. Well...that's not good.

I immediately went to put a hot pad on my back. Normally it would resolve after a couple of hours. I knew something was wrong when I got up the next morning and had trouble getting out of bed. Things that I were able to do before, I was not able to do that particular morning. Putting on socks and pants became a challenge and probably the most painful thing. For the first time, I had to sit down and put socks on. My morning routine was slow that morning but I was still able to accomplish my tasks. The next part was getting into the car. Considering I drive a lowered car, it really didn't help me at all. Getting into the car was not an issue, but getting out was a struggle.

Going to work that morning (and looking back to this, I should've just called in sick), I took my time. Every step that I took, there was a sharp pain in my back that would radiate down my leg, all the way to my foot. It was not a nice feeling. It alternated between pain and numbness. Half the time I couldn't feel my leg. Sometimes my butt was in pain because of the nerves. All in all, it was a struggle.

The second worst thing to occur that morning were my allergies. I had stopped my Reactine for a few days as it was drying out my nose and of course I was getting nosebleeds. The allergies weren't so bad at home, but at work it was a nightmare. This particular morning it started off alright but within the hour, I was in a sneezing frenzy. Because of the constant back pain I was in, every sneeze became a painful nightmare. It felt good to sneeze but I had to force myself not to sneeze sometimes in order to save my back. Oh boy, when that sneeze came and it couldn't be stopped, I was crying in pain soon after. It's interesting how our body works; when we sneeze, we always think well it's just my lungs and nose. Nope, you use your entire abdominal cavity to expel all that air and whatever particles are irritating your nose. So for 8-10 hours, it was torture. And I was stupid for not carrying my Reactine with me. Eventually I got a hold of Benadryl, which was better than nothing at this point. I rather feel the drowsy effect than sneeze for another hour.

Normally I would try to hide my issues, but this time around it was hard to hide my limp that was ever so obvious to everyone. They asked if I was ok, I said 'sciatica'. And they all freaked out, saying I am way too young for this. Yes, I know I am way too young for it but what can I do? I have to learn to deal with it. That's all I can do. So please stop telling me I am too young for anything.

By the time I got home, I was quite relieved. My sneezing had stopped (I did take a Reactine to make sure). I took a shower (ahhh very nice for the back, very soothing), which took forever. And finally, I tried to relax in bed for a bit. When dinner time came around, I was hungry but my problem is...I could not get out of bed. First of all, I couldn't really move much without the pain shooting everywhere. When I had the courage to finally try to stand, I couldn't stand. I nearly collapsed and that scared the living daylights out of me. The problem was, I would try to stand but there was a sharp pain that went from my back to my feet and it just made everything so painful and numb at the same time. I had no strength to support myself. I did not want to take any further risk into harming myself so I ended up going back to bed ever so slowly.

Never in my life did I want to bother anyone to help me, but this time around I had to call my mom for help. She had no idea what was happening as I didn't tell her anything throughout the day, but when she came and saw me, she thought I needed to go to the hospital to get assessed. I guess that's how bad things became. However, I didn't want to bother her or dad and there was no way I would want to go to a hospital during the COVID. I don't think the staff could do much anyways so what was the point. Plus I didn't want to have them exposed to possible sick patients at the hospital so I begged her to not take me. She asked if there was any way we could go to a doctor, but given the circumstances I didn't think any clinics would be open except for the emergency department.

My next challenge was going to the bathroom. I wish I had the equipment to catheterize myself but unfortunately I don't and I didn't want to give myself a UTI. Thank God that I have one of those computer chair on wheels. It took me a while but I managed to transfer myself into that chair and rolled down the hallway using my arms as my guide. Unfortunately for me, the chair was too wide to fit the bathroom door frame. So this was the next challenge: to get inside the bathroom without falling over and cracking my head open. It went successfully, but it was pretty painful. Brushing teeth was a challenge because I couldn't stand straight. The toilet I won't go into much detail, except it took time to lower myself and raise myself up using my arms as strength. This really gave me huge insight into those who have lost both legs to various ailments and who really rely on their arms for transfer purposes. It isn't easy. I give them HUGE credit that they have to deal with it everyday for the rest of their lives. Don't take your limbs for granted (or your body as a whole).

I transferred myself back to bed. I was doing fine until I tried to reposition myself and must have twisted my back somehow. The next thing I know, I am screaming in pain. When that pain hits, the entire body just freezes. It's like a lightning feeling that goes up and down the entire body. The more you tense up, the more intense the pain becomes. It takes a lot of energy to close your eyes, ease your mind, relax your muscles, and let that pain try to go away on its own. That's what I've learned when I have bad flareups. There was one time I became so tense after one of the flareups that the pain just kept going and it felt like forever before the pain finally started to dissipate. It was at this moment that I decided I should take some time off work to recover. People would think I'm crazy for going into work if I couldn't even stand.

Sciatica is no joke. And it can hit anyone of any age. I really think we should stop labelling certain issues as "old people" issues, just like how disc degenerative disease can happen to anyone of any age. If certain trauma happens in a young person's life that they get DDD in their 30's, they shouldn't be told that they're too young to have it, and that it's an "old person's disease". Just like how officials say COVID attacks the older people. No, it can affect ANYONE of ANY age. So please, let's stop labelling things on certain people.

To this day, I still have numbness down one of my legs. It's something that I just got used to, and just learn to deal with it. Ever since that bad flare up, I have been feeling more funny things down my leg. It's hard to describe but the closest I can think of is when you hit your elbow/funny bone against something and you get that weird feeling going down your arm momentarily. That's as close as I can describe this feeling, except it is always there. It doesn't goes away and unfortunately for me, it will probably never go away.

For those who don't have back issues: count your blessings. Please take care of your bodies, of your back especially. Because once you injure your back, it is very difficult to go back to normal after an injury.
For those who are going through back issues: I understand you. We got this. Just keep staying strong, keep up with those massages and physio sessions. And please, just be careful too. We have one life to live, one back to deal with, one chance. Let's aim for recovery and not let it boggle us down.

Checking in - COVID progress

As the title states, we are right in the middle of the COVID pandemic. Lots of things are still shut down, but they have began phase 1 of opening the economy. I wish I had blogged earlier on prior to the announcement of the pandemic but things were just quite chaotic. 

When SARS was here in 2003, I was still in high school. Being new to this role and then suddenly having to deal with a pandemic like COVID while others around me survived through SARS was challenging to say the least. I felt like a child compared to everyone else. I almost felt lost especially during the pandemic plan. It sounds easy by word of mouth but when you sit down with a team to talk about the logistics behind the planning, it was a lot more complicated than I thought. However, this was the time to not complain, and just deal with it. There was no time to absorb, but to just jump into this unknown and just fight it. Save as many people as possible. Try to prevent spread amongst the most vulnerable population. Just do it. 

I have never been so stressed in my life. Prior to the pandemic I was struggling to lose weight. During this pandemic, I've lost weight just because of the stress. Surprisingly it was 8 pounds! I have initiated the intermittent fasting (16/8) and I had lost 2 pounds during that duration but since the pandemic, it added on an extra 6 pounds. Hopefully I can continue this for my own benefit. I think the hardest part about IF is the eating. My biggest fail is snacking. So it's trying to cut out all the sweets from the diet. It wasn't so bad in the beginning but it's a struggle now during the pandemic when stress levels are high, and all I want to do is snack in order to keep going. Anyways, that's something I need to work on, that's for sure.

I hope everyone out there is surviving through this pandemic. I know it must be tough for those who have lost jobs, lost loved ones from the terrible virus or other conditions, or just mentally trying to survive this pandemic. It is tough, and I wish there was a short term solution to fix it all. I know the government implementing these restrictions probably seem too "controlling" and not within our rights as citizens of our countries. However, know that they aren't doing this on purpose and are really trying to limit the spread. I don't believe those protests about trying to reopen the economy. Not only are they putting themselves at risk, but they just don't see the big picture. We are quite thankful the hospitals are not as bad as what Italy was experiencing, because of the early restrictions our unit had taken way before the pandemic was declared. But we are still not safe from it and I don't know if we ever will be. I don't know if this will go away like SARS. I don't know if there will ever be a vaccine. All I know is that if we continue to do our due diligence in following instructions, then yes, we can have a chance at beating this together. We are all in this together. So please, do your best and try to stay home as much as possible. Call your loved ones and keep each other sane and comfortable. 

Just a FYI, no I do not have the COVID as the title seems. I just ran out of ideas to label the title. I wish I could type more, but it's been another crazy week and I've been falling asleep every time I arrive home. I think I've been running on pure adrenaline all week and all day that finally when I can shower and relax, I just complete crash for hours. It's a nice feeling to finally sleep. 

Stay safe everyone. We will get through this. Please tell all your family, all your friends, your loved ones...tell them all that you love them. And actually mean it. Do this every day if you can. Because with all that I see everyday, you just never know what will happen. So do me a favour and do this for you and your loved ones.