Dating Apps 2.0

Remember when I said you wouldn't find me on any dating apps?

It still holds true to this day. 

There is a but though. BUT......

In 2022, I did sign up for ONE app. It was not one of the very common ones (Tinder, Bumble or Hinge). I decided to give it a try. ONE TRY.

I lasted for about 3 weeks. Not even a month. And then I quit.

That's how disgusting these dating apps are.

Let's rewind back to sometime in 2022.

I decided to sign up, upload whatever pictures I thought would bring out my beauty, and figure out how to use the darn thing. Because it was a free app, it only allowed certain amounts of guys for you to view for the day. Then you'd have to wait 24 hours to get the next batch of guys. If I paid money, I would get to see every guy who had liked me and choose who to connect with. Sounds like a waste of money.

I saw all these hearts and likes in my account when I signed back in. Unfortunately I could not see them all because I'm a cheapskate and didn't pay for the app. But I figured I'll get through that list eventually. Someday.

There were a good amount of Asian guys on there. Some of them I recognized from school. I kept telling myself I should message them to say hi.

Let's forward to the ones who did match with me.

I don't remember how many I matched with, but I could count on one hand how many normal conversations I had with the guys. The rest were either weird, very desperate, or ghosts. By ghosts, I mean he would say hello. I'd say hello. His next reply would be 5 days later. Then on the last day before the messages expire, he would ask if he could have my number. UMMM I don't think so. I don't even know you. Goodbye.

The other one started off the conversation with "hey, want to meet up for coffee?" UMMM no, I don't even know you. No icebreaker? I get that people don't want to waste any time but this was way too fast.

Another was from a local church. We did have a pretty good conversation for the first few days. Unfortunately it died off on the last day before messages expire. But he did invite me to check out the English service one day if I was up for it. Thank you kind sir.

Of all the guys I spoke with via messages, I only ever met up with one guy for dinner. He seemed nice and decent. Except for the fact that he kept pushing to watch Turning Red at his condo. Maybe I'm not used to this current dating culture but I did inform him that I was not comfortable going to anyone's place on a first date. The fact that I had to repeatedly say it just showed how much this person really cared. Non existent. 

Now we go into this whole "who pays for dinner on the first date?" I recalled asking him if he wanted to split the bill, but some guys end up footing the bill, which he did. I thanked him for that. We then agreed to grab a bubble tea, of which I said I would grab the bill. I'm not used to the whole "let's split 50/50". I think it's lame. If you invite me, you grab this bill. I'll grab the next. None of this BS 'let me pay you back $26.87. JUST NO.

It seemed like a good first date. But it wasn't the right click for me. Then again, I only met the guy this evening. Maybe I just need more time.

The night ended off with a thank you and a hug, and then one last invitation to go back to the condo for a movie. I politely declined and waved goodbye (as my mind was worried about making it to work the next morning). 

The next few days we chatted on text. He asked if we could go for another date, and there was just something holding me back from accepting that. I didn't know what it was, but it just held me back. The next few days texting back and forth, he was quite open with sharing various food pictures and condo pictures, except I noticed he would say stuff like "I'm hanging out with my friend tonight. Her and I will just be chatting and watching a movie." It's 1am bro. What kind of chatting are you doing. 

Another would be catsitting for a girl friend. Ummm you're catsitting for less than 12 hours? Doesn't make sense either. Cats will be fine without company for 12 hours.

While he was my longest connection on a dating app, it ended rather quickly with him ghosting me. When guys complain about girls ghosting them, it also happens to girls too! But I was so relieved it was over. I guess in this current culture, it's normal for everyone to be dating 25 people at once. There's no more of the "let me focus on one person first and if that doesn't work out, I'll just try again later with someone else." NOPE. No more of that. 

My mind has not gotten used to this culture. The whole let's sleep with 25 people or more until I find the right person. No thanks. I don't want to have a relationship with a STD or STI. I'm good.

The next guy I never met in person. We had a good chat for days as well, until he stopped messaging for whatever reason. About 2 months later, he messaged to say hello!! It's been over half a year and I have not responded back.

After this, I ended up deleting the app for a few reasons. One, because of a family emergency. Two, because I realized if I wanted to go out and meet all these guys, I would have to make time out of my already packed schedule to meet these strangers. Unfortunately I couldn't commit to that. There was also no guarantee that they would commit either. Three, most of the guys on these apps are looking for something casual. 

This was the beginning and end of my dating app adventure. I'm definitely not signing up for anymore. It was too much for my brain to handle. 

Here's to hoping I can find love the normal/natural way (sans dating apps).

2023 - HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

 It's officially 2023!! 

Well, Happy New Year to all of you readers. Thanks for continuing to read my random posts. It's crazy how I've had this blog since I was in high school, which seems like a VERY long time ago. Almost 20 years to be exact. Man, I feel old.

I guess you are wondering why I've kept it for so long. I don't know if I have an exact answer. Part of me is thinking this is almost like a personal diary (except for those who know this link). I can always go back to it and re-read the years and laugh about it. In a way, it's like I've watched myself grow. The other reason is looking back on various events, handbag purchases (haha), and they all have a sentimental value to me. I also appreciate the good and bad that I have blogged about over the years. A lot of my friends who started blogging with me in high school are no longer doing that (unless they have secret pages that I don't know about) as they are all busy with life, and that's understandable. Life takes over and then you forgot you have a blog. I'll aim to keep this going for as long as I can.

Well, we are still in this pandemic after 3 years. It's gotten to the point that people are just sick and tired of it. Ultimately, the people who are the ones that are tired from it are the health care workers dealing with COVID cases. ICU has been bombed with cases during this last wave (to be honest, I've lost count of which wave we are in right now). Omicron variant has sent people into ICU faster than the previous waves. I haven't been into the ICU lately but have friends who work there and they are all burnt out from this pandemic. During Christmas, it was the worst 2 weeks of my entire career. I was helping to staff the unit and it was a logistical nightmare trying to staff all the sick calls, LOA, family emergencies during the holiday. Management said it was the worst Christmas season they've ever dealt with as well. I have never pulled that much OT in a short time span. Everyone who is working doesn't want to work for the money. Those who were off didn't want to come in. It only left very few choices, and ultimately I ended up staying for either 10, 12 or 16 hours at a time. It's exhausting.

Carjackings. There's been so many of that happening. 

2022 was a record of how many cars were stolen from Toronto and shipped overseas for profit. Majority of them are still SUVs (Lexus RX, Honda CRVs being the top ones, F150 pick ups, Raptors are also common). I didn't really hear of sports cars being stolen. I mean, if they're stealing SUVs to use for illegal smuggling, bombings, driving over uneven terrains, then surely a sports car would be useless for that.

I was wrong.

Near the end of 2022 was when a friend had their Ferrari F12 TDF in bright orange carjacked late in the evening. Stolen from Forest Hill area. This story blew up all over social media, especially within the car community. Everyone had their eyes on this car.

Eventually the car was found parked in a handicap spot, underground at an apartment. It was not the police who found it. But a car spotter with a very keen eye. If it wasn't for him, the car would be long gone in a shipping container destined for Dubai. 

Unfortunately that is what happened with another local car enthusiast when his GT3RS and jeep were stolen off his driveway. He was not very lucky with recovering the vehicles. The Jeep was found to be in Montreal. The RS was missing for 4 months, until another car enthusiast spotted it on a Dubai website for sale in late December. Early this month, that post went viral. Many people were bombarding the shop with messages of selling stolen vehicles from Canada. Eventually their social media shut down, and the listing for the RS was removed from their website.

Really, none of us are safe. If you own a sedan or SUV/pick up, you're at risk of having your cars exported to Africa or Middle East. If you own a luxury sports car (depending on model and how limited they are), they could end up in Dubai for the very wealthy.

My advice? If you live in a house (whether it's detached, semi or townhouse), walk backwards into your home. It sounds stupid and may look like you have serious mental issues, but it's the only way that you will get to see your surroundings. Stare people down if you have to. Make yourself look crazy so no one approaches you. Once you turn your back and head towards your door, that's the window of opportunity for someone to run up behind you and attack. 

If you're out shopping and heading towards your car, always be aware of your surroundings. If you can, do a quick scan before approaching your vehicle. I usually do a full 360 to ensure my tires are all inflated. Considering how low profile my cars are, I don't expect anyone to be hiding underneath the car, or in it as my back seats are very small or non-existent. However, people can still put tracking devices underneath your car if they really want to follow you home. And that's why you walk backwards into your home.

Handbags.

Oh boy. Thankfully I have not bought too many in the past year. I did add on a Louboutin tote bag (which I can always review in another post). I am also awaiting a custom bag locally that will have a Porsche emblem on it to match the car. Until then, I think I am done with purchasing. It's insane how much they have increased prices over the years. Unless something REALLY catches my attention, I will sit on the side lines for now. Then again, I say that every damn year.

Dating.

Man, what is with the dating scene these days? When they say there are so many options in hospitals, they're lying. Unless they mean patients, which is against the rule anyways. I'm not adventurous enough to roam the city and find random people to befriend. There's also not much time as I'm mostly working (that's on me though, as I could technically make time, but I choose not to). Everyone suggested 'try the dating apps!' 

Ok so here's my story. It's actually not that interesting. But I signed up for ONE dating app just to try it out. It was free, but they only send you limited suggestions per day. As a woman, you get to choose who you want to connect with, but you can only do that in a limited amount per day. If you pay, you can see everyone's messages. Keep in mind, I'm not that desperate to find anyone. And I'm definitely not paying if I'm not desperate. 

When they say dudes are always being ghosted, I can disagree. Women also get ghosted too. I remember striking up normal conversations, starting off with "hi, how are you" or they had a common interest, you ice break by joking or something. The guys' responses would take days before they acknowledge anything. After almost 7 days of on and off random conversations, they would either stop talking, or ask "want to meet up?" Yeah, no thanks. 

My favourite is when one guy messaged and just asked let's meet up. UMM NO. Maybe if I want to die tonight then sure.

I only survived 3 weeks before quitting it entirely. Part of it was because I wasn't that desperate to date. Part of it was because of a family emergency. 

All in all, those dating apps have made me NOT want to date anymore. It's such an entirely different world out there. I'll just date my cars. 

Alright, that's it for now. Must do some chores.